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From Lust to Losing Your Mind: Science Reveals the Secrets of Love

Discussion in 'General Chat' started by PurpleFox, Jul 5, 2015.

  1. Stage 1: Lust
    Lust is driven by the *** hormones testosterone and oestrogen. These hormones as Helen Fisher says “get you out looking for anything”.
    Stage 2: Attraction
    This is the love-struck phase. People lose their appetite and need less sleep, preferring to spend hours at a time daydreaming about their new lover.

    In the attraction stage, a group of neuro-transmitters play an important role:
    • Dopamine – Also activated by cocaine and nicotine
    • Adrenalin. Starts us sweating and gets the heart racing
    • Serotonin – One of love’s most important chemicals and one that may actually send us temporarily insane!
    Stage 3: Attachment
    This is what takes over after the attraction stage, if a relationship is going to last. It’s the bond that keeps couples together. One hormone in particular is important at this stage.
    • Oxytocin
      This is released by both sexes during orgasm (that’s why we feel bonded after having ***), and also at childbirth. The theory is that the more orgasms a couple has, the deeper their bond becomes.
    You can see how nature has created the three phases to enable the continuation of the species. The first phase of lust sends us looking for a partner, the second phase of romantic love narrows our interest to just one person, and the third phase of attachment enables us to stay together, even when the first rush wears off.

    Here are some facts about attraction. We are attracted by:
    • Symmetrical face
    Asymmetry in faces can be a sign of underlying genetic problems. That’s why we are attracted instinctively to symmetrical faces. (This applies more to men than to women)
    • The hour-glass figure
    Studies show that men prefer women with a waist to hip ratio of 0.7. (You can calculate your own using this formula:
    waist measurement ÷ hip measurement = ratio.
    • Someone who looks similar
    Have you noticed how many married couples look quite similar? Studies have shown that more than anything we prefer somebody who looks just like we do. See if you can spot who are the couples in this Please or Register to view links of individual photographs.

    In a busy life it’s sometimes difficult to meet fitting partners. That’s why Internet dating sites are very popular. Have you ever taken out an ad to find a partner? I tried that once before I met David. At the time I was working as a psychotherapist. Imagine my toe-curling embarrassment when I realised that a guy who had answered my ad was actually a client of mine. And he even started talking about answering an ad in the session with me! Oh dear… I tried to keep my face as blank as possible but I could feel a pink tide rising.

    You can discover the science behind dating ads by taking a Please or Register to view linkstest. The test was published by the BBC. It’s very interesting, as it tells you something about how you see yourself, as well as who you are really looking for).
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