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how to deal with insecure people

Discussion in 'Off-Topic' started by Jeanh, Jan 14, 2016.

  1. Whenever I have to deal with insecure people, I notice that overall they can be the nicest people, but their insecurities can really hinder their relationships. So, what to do? How to deal with insecure people?
    There are people I know, who simply refuse to deal with insecure people, and that’s a personal choice they made. But what if it’s someone who is close to you, such as a friend or a colleague? In this case, you can’t help but have to deal with them. Here are practical ways to get this done.
    It’s advisable to gently attempt addressing the cause of that person’s insecurity. The insecurity may stem from problems associated with their past relationship, or previous employment issues. In either case, it would be beneficial for all involved to discuss the reasons behind their insecurities and have them voice their concerns.
    Insecurity is usually caused by low self esteem. First and foremost, you can not force someone to become more secure with themselves. It is for the individual to decide to make the change, if and when they are ready. Here are ways that you can reassure them of their importance to you.
    Give Attention
    Insecurity can be caused when people feel ignored or unappreciated. People who have a low self esteem, require attention to help them feel valued. Giving them attention, no matter how big or small shows that you care enough to give recognition to them and their achievements. This should help make them feel more secure, and elevate their self worth.
    Give Time
    Spend time with this person. If you are already spending time with them, you may consider increasing the time you spend together. By offering them yourself and your time, you will indicate to them that you enjoy their company and they are valuable to you.
    I’ve had a coworker who had strong insecurity issues. He was always suspecting that he wasn’t good enough for the job he was doing. He always second guessed himself. Finally, I invited him out to lunch and we had a good talk. Turns out, that he was laid off from his previous position which was almost identical to his current one.
    What he wasn’t aware of, is that his previous employer gave him an amazing recommendation. And the reason he was laid off, had in no way related to his performance. It was purely an economical Please or Register to view links. Once I showed him the file, his whole demeanor improved for the better.
    Give Praise
    Make the person feel important by offering them sincere praise for their accomplishments and achievements. Acknowledge the positive aspects of their deeds and behavior. Praise can go far toward making them feel reassured and elevate their self esteem. Certainly, be fair with your praise, and offer it from the heart.
    Maintain Healthy Detachment
    If you have noticed that the above points require you to give of yourself, you are right. After all, if this person is important enough to deal with, nothing says it like self offering. Having said that, it’s important to maintain a healthy, courteous detachment from the insecure person.
    Why is that? Well, an insecure person may act irrationally or destructively. You should be prepared to deal with this possibility. You have good intentions, and the last thing you want to happen is for you to become emotionally hurt by the other person’s behavior. Certainly keep in mind that whenever you Please or Register to view links, emotions can and do get hurt.
    This is why it’s important to maintain your distance. It is also important to remain patient if possible. Any interaction requires patience and understanding. Especially when dealing with someone who may have a low self esteem stemming from their past.
    In Conclusion
    Let me finish by emphasizing that people are good by nature. Sadly, over the span of their lives, some of them accumulate problems that affect their lives in negative ways. We can try to avoid dealing with these people, to push them away. But in reality, they are the same as you and I. Learning to deal with them, can help all of us find common ground and expand our understanding of ourselves and of those who share our lives
     
  2. anu yan demon??

    i know what you think sistah
     
    queencee likes this.
  3. si lej yon jeanh :woot:
    tamang tama yung post mo madaming insecure dito sa office
     
  4. queencee

    queencee Forum Expert Established

    Jhay-eJhay-e ang sweet, ganyan ang true friend, pinapakalma ka like green tea.:kiss: Thanks T.S. Binasa ko from the very start. We all need this.
     
    demonic098 likes this.
  5. alam mo pala yun sistah . :LOL:
    soul ----> :angelic:
     
    queencee likes this.
  6. queenceequeencee yeah..timing nga weh :kiss:

    oyeas..hahaha :kiss:
     
    queencee likes this.
  7. para sa mababait ang thread na to . :angelic:
     
  8. oo..ako din :angelic: weh..kaya meant sa akin to
     
  9. queencee

    queencee Forum Expert Established

    Ahahaha sistah Soul SurferSoul Surfer. Jhay-eJhay-e , maki halo :angelic: na rin para bawas tension, I love it when this happens. Basta tandaan na lang natin, we know each other by heart. Pag nagkita kita tayo in person grabe siguro saya.
     
  10. EARZE

    EARZE PHC Contributor Established

  11. toast chick-en-joy
     
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